Friday, May 20, 2011

Graduation Day

As Graduation day dawned this morning, I woke up with a sense of, if not peace, then at least not utter panic.  I did not wake up by shooting straight up in bed reaching for my little brown bag to hyperventilate into as I have every other day this week.  I didn't reach for my valium lollipops or a large bottle of vodka (joking, really...heh).  Instead, I woke up with a sense of alertness and even....could it be?...happy anticipation.

I think I know what's caused this change of heart.  First, the van is loaded with all various and assorted graduation items:  his exactly four foot long table, white sheet to cover it, maroon sheet for a colorful drape, items of interest for display (including $200 scrapbook - please notice each and every page, would you?) and his guitar case full of music junk.

But really I think what made the difference is that while my house husband was dutifully ironing said sheets, the graduation gown, and ceremony clothes late last night (he irons because he has long ago given up on me learning how to do it) I had an epiphany.  What does every graduation need?  No, really, what does EVERY graduation need? 

A gown is nice. It's being ironed.  Check.  Cap?  It's under the visor on Chad's feep.  Check.  Tassel... Hanging from the rearview mirror. Check.  Anything else?  Anything?  I ponder this through a few crime scenes on The Mentalist.

AHA!  A diploma!  That's what every graduation needs!

OH MY GRAVY!  Where's the diploma!  Did I get one? I forget to get a diploma!  I'm going to real quick write him up writ of something on a piece of tissue paper (unused thankyouverymuch) and roll it up real purty, tie it with a ribbon, and hand it to him in the ceremony. No one will notice, right?

Now wait a minute.  I'm the one in charge of ordering the diplomas.  I got them with the caps and gowns.  Everyone else got one, so it stands to reason I did too.  Where did I put that sucker.  I'm still watching The Mentalist, where Lisbon has now woken up with a bomb strapped to her chest. I see her day is going about like mine.

Where are my best "put it where you won't forget it" places?  Filing cabinet? No, I was just searching for our income taxes and it's not there. Bookshelf 1? No. 2? Nope. 3 through 6? Not a chance.  Freezer?  Breakfast bar?  Hope chest?  I give up. I'll never find it.  Some diploma stealing fairy snuck in here and took off with my baby's diploma.  The nerve.

Wait a minute. The Homeschool Paper/Misc Crap Chest!  Maybe that's it?  First drawer I opened, and there, shining like a beacon of light, lay that gorgeous diploma, complete with it's cover and gold foil seal.  It's now filled out and signed by the teacher (me) and the principal (Peter) and my life is complete. 

I figure we have a cap, gown, tassel, and diploma. Everything else is just gravy.  Let the graduation begin.

1 comment:

  1. We just missed a crisis, this morning! Excited for tonight.